Comfort & Compassion Ministry

Eyes for Eternity

Karol Ladd — Tue, 21 Feb 2012 18:03:26 +0000

Robin Hiser is a high-functioning Down syndrome woman in her fifties who has a deep and abiding love for the Lord. She lifts others up through her encouraging words and genuine love for people, and she gives God all the glory. Robin recognizes the value of every person and sees them as a creation of God and a part of his handiwork. Although she admits it is difficult for her when some people look down on her because she looks and talks differently, she knows God created her for a special purpose.

Robin loves to worship the Lord and read her Bible. In fact, she inspires others to a deeper faith and desire to walk with God in simplicity and truth. She says her greatest joy will be when one day she enters heaven and Jesus hugs her saying, “Well done, good and faithful servant.” Until then, she has work to do here on earth and serves God wherever he leads her. Robin’s life is rich and meaningful because of her eternal perspective. She has a joyful outlook because she is living her life with a wide-angle lens. She is not living for this world; she is living for God’s kingdom.1

Robin’s story reminds me of how important our perspective in life is in relation to our day-to-day struggles. If we are living and working for only this life and the here and now, we can easily grow discouraged, tired, and even depressed. But when we recognize that God can use our difficulties and disabilities in a special purpose, we see inklings of hope that can grow into joy. No matter what limitations we have or how difficult our situation is, God can still use us.

Where is your focus? Is it on what’s going wrong in your life, or is it on a big God who is able to bring meaning to your life? Are you consumed with the miserable situation you are in now, or are you looking with expectation to the bigger picture of what God can do? Our focus makes a difference in our attitude and actions. May God give us strength for today and bright hope for tomorrow.

One thought of eternity

Makes all earthly sorrow fade away.

—Basilea Schlink

This is an excerpt from my book Thrive, Don’t Simply Survive. Learn more about Robin Hiser go to http://www.joniandfriends.org/blog/robin-hiser/

Sit Down Martha!

Niki Carbajal — Thu, 16 Feb 2012 22:36:00 +0000

My recently turned three-year-old is decidedly a big boy. He no longer wants sippy cups (less to wash!) or help with his hair and clothes. He wants to be a big kid like his siblings. He has even started enjoying Bible story time before bed. Because of his enthusiasm for story-time with the other kids, we have put aside our Bible geared for older kiddos and have pulled out the My First Bible Stories. He loves to talk about the pictures (especially the snakes and fiery furnace) and listens as we read. It is such a blessing to hear the older kids retell the stories to their littlest brother.

Last week, we read the story of Martha and Mary. This particular version of the story was very clear that Martha's tone of voice was less than appealing and even boarded on the nagging and complaining side. And this was not complaining with thanksgiving but just plain ol' feeling sorry for herself complaining. Martha whined about all of her work and lack of help. I retold the story with an exaggerated whine-and-cheese voice to really drive the point home.

We discussed how Martha was so busy whining, and doing, and complaining, and being busy with busyness, that she missed the pleasure of the Lord. The pleasure of His smile. His voice. His comforting hand on the top of her head. His joy at seeing her at His feet. She missed it.

I asked the kids how Mary might have felt, how Martha might have felt, and most importantly, how Jesus might have felt. Their replies included: sad, lonely, frustrated, confused. One of the kids thought Mary would feel satisfied because she would get to share in Martha's good meal AND have Jesus all to herself.

Can anyone guess which of my children had that point of view?!

That same child says to my tired, haggard, and patience-worn-thin-face, "Mom? You're just like Martha. Always busy. Always ordering us around for school. Chores this. Chores that. Frustrated face here and frustrated voice there."

Whoa. Who asked for this conviction? From a 7 year old at 8:30 p.m.?

Another traitor, a.k.a my oldest daughter, pipes up, "Yeah, Mom, how come you never just sit?".

More conviction. Is this how they see me? Frustrated and whining about laundry, dishes, school, and all the other normal household stresses? Rushing here and there to complete a task with a grim line for a mouth?

"Did you leave your smile in your pocket, Mom" asks the 5 year old sweetheart. "No, darling. I'm just busy. And thinking. And busy thinking."

Is that what I want them to see in their mind's eye when I'm thought of? Is that what I want to teach as expected behavior?

Obviously, no. And, I will extend myself a little grace here. My personality is "Martha" all the way. I do things now and process them later. I find joy and fulfillment in serving others, doing for others, and ending a day with a crossed-off list. It's when the list was never touched or even written down that I become frustrated!

Moving forward . . . the Lord's use of a children's Bible story and my boldly spoken children to touch my heart was heard and felt. I've made a conscious effort to ask the Lord to clearly indicate where I need to stop and notice. Notice Him in the details of my day. Notice Him in the rare quiet fellowship of my children and even in their rambunctious laughter. To notice Him in the mess, the mess, the mess.

I am also asking Him to show me how He values me as a Martha and how to grow me more Mary-like. And I am ever so more thankful that He uses my children to convict me. Over and over again. Who knew God gave me children to keep me humble?!

O Christ, do not give me tasks equal to my powers,
but give me powers equal to my tasks,
for I want to be stretched by things too great for me.
I want to grow through the greatness of my tasks,
but I shall need your help for the growing.
E. Stanley Jones

Because You’re Already Amazing

Kristen Strong — Thu, 16 Feb 2012 07:23:28 +0000

My Faith and I don’t talk too much during our mother~daughter date to the Four Continents Figure Skating Championship. The magic of it all leaves us spellbound. I mean, these skaters move powerfully but gracefully on ice. The men lift and throw the women, they all jump and spin on skinny blades on ice. Amazing, really.

One pair {from Canada, I think?} struck me not because of how perfectly they skated or how well they placed. My untrained eye noticed mistakes and she fell twice. But as they released their final pose, I looked up at the huge television screens just in time to see her turn and whisper “I’m sorry” to him. I couldn’t make out his reply, but by the way he smiled so warm while hugging her so tight, he believed there was nothing to forgive.

She was already amazing, and a couple of falls didn’t make that less true. If she’d nailed every element to sheer perfection, she wouldn’t have been more amazing. She would have had a better performance, but the heart of her identity wouldn’t be any different.

It’s the same with you, ya know. And me. We don’t have to be more, do more, or have more to be amazing. And if there’s one woman who knows a thing or twenty about this, it’s Holley Gerth. Or as I like to call her, “every woman’s sister.”

Meet Holley’s brand spankin’ new book baby, You’re Already Amazing: Embracing Who You Are, Becoming All God Created You to Be. Isn’t she just beautiful?

When I say Holley is every woman’s sister, I mean she loves and encourages from a place in her heart that shines Jesus like an effervescent lightbulb. You can’t help but want to be her sister. Or her BFF. Or her SBFF {Sister BFF}. She *is* God-inspired encouragement, and her words breathe fresh air in your life.

Today, You’re Already Amazing is available for pre-order at Barnes & Noble for half-price! And hello! While her book isn’t even out yet {due to release next month} it’s already #1 at the Barnes & Noble site! Glory be! {What a great Easter or Mother’s Day gift this book would be!}

May your day {and your weekend} be amazing, darlings. Not because of all you do, but because of Christ who lives in you. Perfect double axles or not, your identity is safe in Him.

The Hard Work of Love and Marriage

Kristen Strong — Wed, 15 Feb 2012 16:08:38 +0000

I answer the knock on the practice room door in the basement of the music building, and I assume it’s someone wanting to use the room. I’m already talking about how I’m almost done as I swing open the heavy door. My eyes turn silver dollar size as I meet a sea of pink, pink roses spun in green and silver wrapping paper. I look up at the deep brown smiling eyes behind them and can’t help but fall into them, those eyes that make me smile and blush. It’s February 15th, so I don’t expect flowers. Not that I expected them on Valentine’s Day, either.

I stumble out a surprised thank you, but he just cocks his head sideways and shrugs.

“I heard you tell your friend yesterday that you didn’t get anything for Valentine’s Day. I wanted to fix that.”

I notice the roses aren’t from the store, and he later mentions he got them from his grandmother’s house. I don’t think about how she grows roses in February. I don’t care. Because even though I’m awkward as a 3 dollar bill and scared of my own shadow, he notices me. He didn’t overlook what he overheard.

Nineteen years later and he still notices the things that matter.

Oh, you can be sure I notice things, alright. I notice thick combat boot socks laying on the bedroom floor. And dirty dishes by the sink, even though our kitchen is weird and has one of those newfangled dishwashers right. next. to. the. sink. And I cannot tell a lie: those dishes in the sink annoy me. As do the socks on the floor. I sigh too loud and grumble too long.

When it comes to walking with God, there is no such thing as instant maturity. God doesn’t mass produce His saints. He hand tools each one, and it always takes longer than we expected.

Charles Swindoll

I hate complaining about stuff that really doesn’t amount to a hill of beans. But, I still do it. Could dirty socks on the floors and cups by the sink be God’s hammer and chisel used to slowly, deliberately scrape away my heart’s hard parts? Opportunities to practice grace? To live it out? It makes sense because He cares infinitely more about a clean heart than a clean house. And when I get to heaven’s gates, it’s the state of my heart that will be under examination, not the state of my house.

When I pick up the laundry and put away the dishes, I let grace work like a broom and sweep the offense out the back door of my mind. Oh, it doesn’t feel good at first. Chiseling hurts and it takes time. But I hear Jesus ask, “Will you let this harden or help you?” and I am encouraged to trade what feels good in the moment for what moves me towards maturity.

Every marriage faces bigger issues that shouldn’t be swept away but brought into noonday light and stared at and talked out. Every marriage has to do the hard examinations. May I notice the important and allow God’s tools to fashion an inspired likeness of marriage built on a foundation of grace.

What You Need to Know You Belong

Kristen Strong — Tue, 14 Feb 2012 13:23:09 +0000

Did I ever tell y’all I was Miss Arkansas 1991? It’s true.

Well, sorta.

Actually, I was Miss Arkansas band camp.

Not quite the same, I suppose? Well, you already know I play oboe, so my I’m-just-a-big-nerd-and-always-have-been secret isn’t really a secret, now is it.

In high school, we band kids knew all the band-geek jokes and where we fell on the popularity totem pole. We couldn’t have cared less, and you know why? Because we belonged, and band was our catalyst for belonging. We were individual as snowflakes, but we shared a common interest and built a little community around it. I’ve seen the same thing in school classrooms, sports teams, and military squadrons. The team spirit sparks genuine camaraderie and friendships, and there’s no denying the sense of belonging felt by its members.

Since getting married, I’ve lived in ten neighborhoods across five states {and one ocean}. Not that many for a military family, but enough to see all kinds of friendship seasons. Sometimes friendships formed quickly, sometimes they took their sweet time. When I’ve been blessed to have close-knit community, there’s no doubt the sense of belonging makes my soul sing.

I want that same sense of belonging in my map dot home of Colorado Springs. I bet many of you want this in your neck of the woods, too. Do you know who else wants this for you? The folks of (in)courage. This is why they are pouring their heart and soul into something called (in)RL.

What is (in)RL? First of all, it’s short for in real life. (in)courage thrives on building relationships that bless you in your day to day, and they want (in)RL to be the catalyst that sparks new friendships in your own zip codes. So, in an effort to encourage us to form near and dear friendships, (in)courage dreamt up (in)RL. Think of it as one giant excuse to get together {and gab} and hang out {without worrying about our hang-ups}.

If you want to take part in this global meet-up on a local scale, you have two options:

1. Host a meet-up in your home, at Starbucks, or wherever suits your fancy.

2. Attend a meet-up that is already happening in your area.

There is a $10 registration fee that includes a T-shirt and Simply Marvelous card pack. {FYI ~ (in)RL is not a money-making venture for DaySpring. The registration fee simply covers the price of those two items.} A community keynote will kick off Friday night, and then Saturday will be the get-together part. There will be additional videos available for viewing if you or your host so desires.

If you’re a visual learner like me and want more insight into this whole crazy-beautiful notion, peek at the videos below. They feature several of the (in)courage writers {including yours truly in the second one}.

For more enlightenment into (in)RL, *please* read Deidra’s article from yesterday and Jessica’s tomorrow. Both these darling women are master encouragers and write tenderly and eloquently about friendships and community.

If you’ve visited here for 5 minutes, you know I get how hard it can be to make friends. It feels messy and tricky. But maybe – just maybe – (in)RL could be the catalyst that removes these scary parts so your heart feels free to connect with new folks.

I love you ladies so much. If you live in the Colorado Springs vicinity, please stop by my own meet-up! And in the comments below, feel free to ask more questions about (in)RL. I’ll do my best to answer {although you may find some of them answered in this Q and A about (in)RL }. Also, what do you find to be the most difficult thing about forming new friendships? The most difficult thing about maintaining established friendships?

Blessed Voice

Karol Ladd — Mon, 13 Feb 2012 18:18:03 +0000

As our hearts grieve over the untimely death of Whitney Houston, we feel a deep sadness at the loss of such a great artist. Our minds race with questions as to how this could have happened and why. There is no easy way to understand all of this, but there are some truths amidst the grief which we can hold onto in life.

We all struggle. Our struggle may not be as public or as painful as Whitney’s, but we all have areas in which we struggle to overcome bad habits or destructive tendencies. The Bible reminds us that we have all sinned and come short of God’s glory.
We all need God’s help. Trying to solve our problems on our own terms often leads us to frustration. Yet, God in His kindness did not leave us to fight our battles alone. He sent His only Son Jesus into the world that we might live through Him. He gives us hope and strength. Most importantly, because of what Jesus did on the cross, those who trust in him are forgiven.
He invites us to come to Him. God doesn’t promise to solve all our problems, but He does promise to walk with us through the dark valleys. As we place our trust in Christ, we are not alone. He gives us His spirit. He lavishes His love upon us. Most importantly we know that He prepares us place for us in Heaven.

I believe Whitney knew Jesus and is with Him right now in glory. May we look forward to the day when we will join together with one voice praising Him. If you want to talk to someone about a relationship with Christ please go to www.chataboutJesus.com. I thank the Lord for Whitney’s beautiful talent and the gift that she was to this world.

Fabulous Friendships

Karol Ladd — Mon, 06 Feb 2012 22:31:18 +0000

“A friend is a present you give yourself.” Robert Louis Stevenson

After over 30 years, my Baylor roomates decided to reunite for a weekend of encouragement, prayer and support. We laughed and shared for hours about our family, our work and the nitty-gritty of our lives. It was a weekend of refreshment to our souls.

As women, we need heart to heart connectedness. In this month of love, take some time to thank the Lord for your friendships. Consider ways to deepen the relationships God has already placed in your life, and also be aware of other potential friendships waiting to be blossomed. In our book, The Power of a Positive Friend, my dear friend and college roomie Terry Ann offered seven principles of a positive friendship:

Build on the common interests.
Be an encourager, not a discourager
Be a giver.
Value loyalty.
Connect on a spiritual level.
Be open, honest and real.
Be a gracious forgiver.

Watch the video of Terry Ann and me as we returned from our trip at www.karolladd.com

To learn more about Terry Ann’s amazing ministry for kids go to www.studentsstandingstrong.org

When You Need Some Fresh Air of Your Own

Kristen Strong — Mon, 06 Feb 2012 16:56:58 +0000

The calendar tells me it’s February, but my mind and body are convinced it’s April or May. Our January was long, and since this business with Faith’s broken neck slammed down on us, November and December weren’t exactly a church picnic. We usually talk about how time flies, but lately my time moves in slow-mo. One month feels like three. Am I the only one who sometimes experiences this?

Speaking of Faith, I’m thankful to report her vertebrae are healing and fusing like good little bones. I jumped up and down and cried when I heard this but fought the temptation to hug the neurosurgeon. {He’s a kind but reserved man; not the hugging kind. Plus I guess that’d just be kinda weird?} We heard this news two weeks ago, and I find myself still exhaling from it. Funny how I didn’t even know I was holding my breath.

With Faith needing to wear the brace two more weeks {ish}, we see a light at the end of the tunnel. She already takes it off at home on her down times, and the muscles in her head and neck are waking up and getting used to working again. I am slowly getting used to not reminding her to “be careful, be careful, be careful” a hundred times a day. I laugh at myself when I realize how second nature it’s become for those two words to fly out of my mouth.

Holding onto Christ and walking by faith kept me from turning cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs through the ordeal, and we have all learned difficult, wouldn’t-trade-for-anything lessons. But the need to rest in Jesus means I admit I’m tired.

I explain this to a friend, how this business with Faith and other things have me flat-lined, especially creatively. In her words-that-soothe-a-dry-soul way, she tells how busier, more difficult seasons leave our emotional and physical bank accounts empty, and this causes everything to suffer. Lately both have received withdrawal after withdrawal, so I know she’s right.

Sometimes I wish to write here more often. But you see, I don’t want to write just to have something to post, I want to post because I have something to write. And I want to write because I have something to say that encourages you. So if I’m a little quieter here and there, it’s only because I’m depositing into those accounts so I have something good to give. It’s the only way I know to ensure my encouragement stays the fresh air kind.

Speaking of ‘fresh air encouragement’, I am reworking my tagline. However, I want to keep those three words as part of it. I want to lose the ‘country girl’ part. Oh, I am a country girl as much as ever, but that part of me doesn’t take front and center in my writing like I thought it would. So if you have any thoughts on a good tagline – maybe insight into what you feel you get from my blog – I would love, love, love your suggestions and input!

I love you, darlings. You are fresh air to me! Thank you for being gloriously beautiful you.

Love Actually

Niki Carbajal — Fri, 03 Feb 2012 05:48:00 +0000

February! It's the month of love. Spring flowers began to peek up through the ground. Diamond dynasties and card companies create in our heads visions of ginormous rocks on a band, heart-shaped chocolates, and sappy but heart-felt sentiments from our loved ones. Our expectations of a over-the-top romantic Valentine's Day increase with each passing day.

As a teenager, Valentine's Day was the best day all year. Boys could buy their sweethearts a single rose and have it secretly delivered during the middle of Algebra II or Chemistry. All the girls would gush excitedly while secretly hoping their own beau would have their flower delivered during the next period. Please, oh please!

As I've gotten older, I tell my husband not to spend money on flowers and candy. I don't even need a card. Just let me sleep late. For a week. Serve our kids breakfast so I can linger in the shower. Alone and without an audience. Acts of service make my heart melt. If he does the dishes on a whim, my knees turn to jelly and I hear imaginary love birds chirping in my ear.

This February, a sweet friend challenged her Facebook friends to 14 Days of Valentines. It's a two week commitment to pray specifically for your husband. It's an encouragement to leave him small notes or gifts on a daily basis to completely fill up his love tank. I am completely charged by the challenge. In fact, since Weekend to Remember last year I have been praying very specifically for my husband. Below, are a few ways I am praying for him.

He acknowledges Jesus as the leader of his life by following and obeying Him, and relying on the Holy Spirit all day, every day (1Cor 16:13-14).
He take responsibility as the leader of his family, courageously leading me and our children (Eph 5:23).
He be a man of prayer, continuously in communication with the Lord so that he'll live and walk by His Spirit (1 Thess 5:17, Gal 5:25).
He have friendships with godly men that would "stir up one another to love and good works" (Hebrews 10:24).
He be shielded by God in mind, heart, and body, and be guarded from the evil one (Psalm 28:7, 2 Thess 3:3).

Sometimes, it's really hard to pray for my husband rather than about him (read here - complain about him). So, I become selfish and find one or two things to thank the Lord for regarding the man He gave me and call it "Done". Oh but don't worry. Those are the days the Holy Spirit wakes me at 3:00 a.m. with a conviction to pray for him.

And pray, I do. And will continue to do. And I even ask the Lord to prompt my sweet hubby to do a few more dishes and a little more laundry.

When You Need Friends {But Have a Hard Time Finding Them}

Kristen Strong — Wed, 01 Feb 2012 13:05:03 +0000

Pssst… just peeking out from under blankets, kleenex {kleenexes?}, books and honey lemon tea to croak out a hello. My daughter waves too, as she’s snuggled in next to me with the same sniffly sneezy fevery virus. Right now I pause the Barbie movies and Say Yes to the Dress re-runs to share a story below. I pray it gives you a bit of friendship encouragement for your heart!

I’m out of breath from hurrying {though I’m still late} and forcing my stubborn side-by-side double stroller up the hill to the playgroup location, an indoor playground. I’m nervous, too, since I’m visiting for the first time. I heave the heavy door open and awkwardly bang the stroller against the frame a half a dozen times before making it through. Once inside and settled, I approach moms and chat as best I can while wrangling waggling toddlers. I finally realize this familiar, established sorority isn’t interested in pursuing conversation with me beyond introductions.

A short while later, I find a local mom’s group. Soon after joining, I volunteer to host a meeting in my home. I clean house, cook snacks, and wrestle kids. Then I wait as not. one. person shows up.

These and other friend discouragements found me thiiiis close to putting a sign in my yard saying, “Desperate woman seeks friends!” If there had been a way to do it without looking so, ya know, desperate I would have done it. After all, I had the poster board and markers.

It did take {a whole lotta} time, but I finally made friends. And lo and behold, I didn’t have to put a sign up in my yard to find them. Continue here?